Courage · 2 min read
Be the one who makes the invitation
A friendship needs moments where somebody reaches out. You can create one. Invite a person for a walk, suggest a game or ask someone to join you for coffee. Keep it simple and leave room for their answer. Your initiative can give a good connection somewhere to begin.
You would like more connection in your life. There is someone you enjoy talking with, but the conversations keep ending with a vague promise to get together sometime. Give that possibility a little shape. An invitation does not have to be impressive. It needs to be clear enough for another person to understand what you are offering.
Choose something that fits both the relationship and your circumstances. A short walk after work. A free community event. A game with a few people. Offer a time or a simple choice of times. Make it easy for the person to decline or suggest something else. You are opening a door, and they get to decide whether to walk through it.
A delayed response or a no can sting. It also leaves much you do not know about the other person's schedule, preferences and responsibilities. Respect the answer without turning it into a sweeping judgment about yourself. You can continue meeting people through shared interests and appropriate community spaces, where there are repeated opportunities for conversation to grow naturally.
If the invitation becomes a plan, bring your attention to the person when you meet. Ask a sincere question. Listen. Let the time have its own pace. Connection develops through actual moments shared, and someone has to help those moments happen. Be willing to contribute that initiative. There may be a good conversation, a new routine or a friendship waiting on the other side of an ordinary invitation.
Give connection a time and a place.
About this piece
Original STUDmotivation writing; everyday examples are illustrative.
Written to encourage worthwhile effort and positive action. Our approach and sources.